FemmeNoir
A Web Portal For Lesbians Of Color


Poetry & Fiction

First Love

Liking women just kind of came up on me.  I really never thought about it much until I got into high school and joined the track team.  I was mostly interested in this guy on the football team til I found out he had a girlfriend.  But, when I got on the track team I met this girl who I had seen around the school before but never really took notice of her. 

The girl was fine too and knew it.  Everybody liked her, boys and girls.  But I knew I really liked her when I started getting jealous when some of the boys would talk to her.  It took me a while to understand that one.  But, just like you talked about your heart skipping a beat or leaping for joy or whatever, that's how this girl made me feel.  I looked forward to track practice just to see her and hear her push you on in the way she did while we were sprinting around the school.  She was a natural leader too. 

That summer, we just started hanging out together.  Talking about being excited everyday.  I know I was because I knew I'd see her.  She'd either come over to my house or I'd go over to her house and we'd just hang out, just me and her.  Sometimes we would hook up with a few friends and hang out at the park, but mostly it was just the two of us.  After a while, people started calling us the bopsy twins cause we was always together. 

One day though, I think it was the 4th of July, we went to the park with our friends and went back to my house just to hang out.  My mom was working the swing shift that night so we had the house to ourselves.  We started drinking some wine . . . damn, Boonesfarm I think it was and smoking some weed.  Everybody started leaving and it was just the two of us and we started doing silly stuff like making fun of what we saw on TV, singing to some songs on the radio, acting like we were on stage, silly stuff and then we fell across the couch just laughing and that's when it happened.  We started kissing.  Just thinking back on that now ... girl, I'll never forget that night.  I was sooo f**king horny. 

I didn't know nothing bout nothing but Ms. Thang knew what to do.  She had definitely been here before.  So you know I let her work me over.  And you know she spent the night and my mama came in that morning and yes ma'am she was in bed with me.  But she was cool and never said nothing.  In fact, I didn't get no drama like a lot of folks did.  She said she always kind of felt I was or would be. 

After that day, I knew what I liked and what I wanted.  I forgot about that football player.  We kind of maintained until after high school.  She and I both had boyfriends for a minute, which was cool because we really didn't want nobody to know what was up. 

Anyway, I'm old now and you're right, it ain't the same ... too much drama, too many games.  But, I'll never forget her. 

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